Most scary thing about writing and sharing one’s feelings and observations is just the before the beginning. It is hardest .Especially someone like me who thinks too much _:). However as soon as I start the feeling is so good ,I would say the best feeling for me. Also extremely relaxing and satisfying. I am writing this blog under the stars by the beautiful pool .I could feel the refreshing balmy breeze and I am listening the sound of palm trees leafs.
I have been on a journey since more than a year ago. It started with my decision to go to acting school in New York . I would not call it real satisfying journey though. Real satisfaction I got was during my trip to Ecuador ,Peru and Colombia trips. New York turned out to be a journey to myself ,a journey to know differences between good and bad , what I like ,what I do not like ,what kind of personality I have comparing to the others in acting school .It could sound to harsh but I have seen the worst in human soul during that time in school.
Well , I started to write this blog with intention of being solo or alone . Sometimes I give too much pressure to myself saying ohhh I am alone and i do not have a significant other . It is state of mind . Again writing helps a lot ,while I am here writing , I am happy not a lone at all.
I was thinking so many beautiful things , It is all in me . If I do not share them , they will all fade away . Therefore I need to remind myself to write them down. And there is no better time than now when One is alone during solo traveling. It is extremely satisfying looking at the shinny screen of my Mac .It is also very depressing if I do not use my Mac for writing or reading but only for social media.
Social media could be usual on the road if one uses it to connect to others who travel and share their knowledge ,also to remember all the wonderful people I meet on the road ,at the same time if one gets use to it ,it could be very time consuming .
Ok , I was gonna write about being a solo ,alone girl on the road .Lets start .
Ok , I was really lonely in New york and I could not handle it well. It is all together different ball game. However ,I love being lonely during my travels. Sometimes I am lonelier more than I want but it is not permanent .I know I will feel much better in a few days so on.Know that loneliness can be a teacher. It teaches you how to be calm, how to be strong, how to be patient. It teaches you to learn to live with yourself. And I am loving learning these lessons. These are very important for me , I always loved reading and writing , taking long walks and I have never had boyfriends ,only a husband for nine years -:) whom I was always lonely with .However I never felt relax with being lonely even I preferred to be lonely .I put so much pressure on myself asking questions like why I was not like other girls so on. So I have so much learn from solo and traveling solo. One is never alone and alone at the same time.
tO BE CONTINUED……I am off to go a good restaurant and talk to everybody who works there. Where I am now people know me and they are always so happy to see me .Even I am surprised when they remember my name. I am called here Miss Elvan.